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Q07

How would you like to improve yourself and your life next year? Is there a piece of advice or counsel you received in the past year that could guide you in this project?

I want to appreciate the beauty of 'enough.' We have enough.  The house is clean enough.  I am enough.

Just do it!  If you want to move, just move.  If you want to walk, just walk.  If you want to write, just write.  Don't wait for better circumstances.  Just do it, don't talk about it.

I would like to become more active.  Since retirement I have become very isolated.  Finding people in the age group of 71 plus, who understand that I am from another country and sometimes feel lonely wishing for my Old Friends and Land.

So much to improve, too much to list; but I know the list well anyway. The best advice came last night at Kol Nidre services. We confess the same sins each year because we are bound to repeat them. We fail. But we try. And that's the important thing: to try and to become just a bit better each year. So don't strive for Nirvana, just for each year to be better than the next.

I would like to be more calmer and be able to forgive those who have wronged me in the past. It's not easy to just forgive and forget. But my mother told me, to become a better person, a good person, I need to learn how to let things go and not hold grudges. In the end, holding onto things can be deadly and I would like to think of myself as one with myself. So hopefully, I can try to better myself by not letting trivial matters affect me so much.

I would like to improve my health, my spiritual health and financial health. I want to be able to make tremendous strides to become debt free so I can do more for myself and my daughters. One very important life lesson I've learned is to never make a permanent decision based on temporary circumstances.

I've just divorced after several years of misery and humiliation. I want to find the person I used to be and know I can be again: confident, brave, and happy.

I want to be able to speak Hebrew fluently and help to campaign for safe driving on Israel's roads. After my brother was horribly injured as a pedestrian in a road accident in Jerusalem last week, just prior to Rosh Hashana, I had to decide whether to dash to the hospital although he was - and still is - in deep sedation. A very young woman commented sagely: "You could go - not for a reason. You could not go - for a reason". I went!

I would like to improve my social abilities. I'm a social person in some ways, but timid and isolated. And at this time last year I'd made some progess, but now I've almost entirely regressed. Which is not pleasant. I'd also like to kick the stutter I seem to have developed in recent years. I remember being articulate... But I know I can't afford a speech therapist, and as much as my therapy sessions in the past have shown me some of what I need to pay attention to and force myself to do to remain socially active, it's hard to do without someone holding me accountable.

I would like to cut down on how much I complain about things. I have a pretty awesome life, save for a few problem areas like my roommate, and I need to stop complaining about her and start being happy about other things.

I'm really hoping to get on top of time management. It's really about SELF management - managing myself in every sense of the word - planning, implementing, reviewing, and improving.

I would like to be more comfortable, more confident when I meet and talk with those with great wealth. It's not that I would EVER want to change my life for theirs because I have so many blessings. I just wish I could be a touch less class-conscious.

I want to cultivate my sense of compassion. When faced with interpersonal conflict, it's so easy to respond with frustration. It's so easy to forget to give the benefit of the doubt. It's so difficult to swallow pride and see the other side. Compassion is the opposite the knee-jerk cynicism and pessimism. Over the next year, I hope to learn how to override that negative reflex and respond to others with compassion instead.

I would like to master my anxiety disorder through natural methods. I believe that I can trade my medication for healthy remedies like meditation and yoga and, slowly but surely, I will. On the other hand, I was reminded this past year that sometimes medication is necessary and that asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness, so I have already made peace with the possibility that I will need both Western and Eastern treatments for a while.

I am just always looking to avoid feelings of jealousy. I feel that is a weak emotion for me and want to be able to control it. I always strive to feel grateful for what I have in my life. My health, my family, my friends. Anything after that is just extra wants. Someone told me this year that women are a points system. Nobody is perfect, but you try to find the one with the most overall points across the board.

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